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What was written before...
I have taken away. The crisis with Sal, kind of spread in ways, that ultimately made 3 people deeply sad and disappointed, involved around 5 people in all. With this kind of ripple effect, and because it goes far deeper into the private sphere, which goes outside of my life - i can not with good feeling, have the details left from my former entry on this page. It just is impossible. So, I took it away.
It also affected out best friend in Sicily, so hard and deep, that it almost scares me, that i could have such consequences on the emotional plane, literally sucking the air out of her - and boy none of us wanted this. Not even remotely, and I feel inconsolable about that she suffers. This was never supposed to happen. And I had no clue that it would pull so many strings, i was not even aware or informed about in confidence... kind of like opening Pandora's box.
I also see that nobody did this on purpose, so no blame. But i feel so sorry for our friend, and now both Sal and are sad because our friend got crushed in the process. I can't even believe how this could happen (it's very confusing to say the least).
Regarding Sal and I
we are about to fix our relationship, and he sees the string of lies he made, had far wider and deeper consequences on more people than just him,.. So, perhaps this will give him a lesson and after thought - the kind of that really calls for stepping up, in terms of maturity, and when to stop with certain activities with other people, as well in terms of honesty.
It needs to be addressed - and now we talked about this in depth. I hope this clears the front. But i also hope it can heal the scars in other people who stand close to us, which kind of got dragged in and there, creates new circles of confusions and circumstances from the past related to the present time.
It's confusing. But we'll iron it out - and we are both in on that.
At the same time - a deep conflict - also has the potential of that you rub each others sharp edges off - and might learn something from it. If it is your willing goal to follow your hearts wisdom and lead. Not all have such a call. But if it is there - then there is potential for growth. Real growth can take place after conflicts, when both parts return to their humble positions, instead of defending their ego and bad actions.
Once you step out of that, you can step up, and learn something in the process. I believe were are that process now.
I will not loose any more details about what happened in my Diary. I feel i do need to draw a line between deepest private life and casual aspects, the latter which i can write about. I guess now that i am older, things feel a bit different. I also feel more responsible about other people's integrity today. Which I didn't back then 20 years ago...
First rain after 31 days
Here in Southern Stockholm, it is the first since since 17 May 2023, we got rain again. Quite amazing with such a long period of no rain. There was one day, in which a few drops came down, and just north of Stockholm 2 or 3 mm.
Right now, at 13:32 - my rain meter has registered 2.2 mm rain since midnight. |
