Physical looks is a deceiving area of perception. Or perhaps I should instead say, that age has a SPECTRUM of ages... It isn't fixed into a certain age, but more like a span width of age.

I am now almost 58 years of age. I still look like typically Ralf - so that I kind of like. But i have "different faces" - and it seems as if they sometimes change within only hours. I have one example I saved, which makes the change in looks within only hours visible.


A little makes quite the difference

The images are from 2019, within a few hours. The first shows me un-groomed, and the latter where I had cut my hair and groomed my face a little bit. The difference is fascinating... like shaving off 10 years. Of course there are psychological aspects embedded. Glasses, gray stubbles and generally uncut haircut... does make you look a bit older. Nothing strange at the horizon.

But just a little grooming can make quite the difference. And yes, Sal and I do color our beards. But with the difference that we use a color that is 2-3 nuances lighter than our natural color. That way, it looks far more natural compared to when you use "your color" with the result of that it looks artificially too dark.


15 may 2019, 21:01

15 may 2019, 23:26


Scandinavian Summer vs Winter

Another aspect which makes a difference are the variations between summer and winter. I often see that people simple look more gloomy during latter winter here in Stockholm. Once they are charging their cells with solar radiation, you can spot a vitalization in their skin and looks. Often shaving off 7-10 years their age.

I find that truly fascinating...

Since I am often not in the sun - which is rather unfortunate - but I am mostly bound to the way I work night shifts and rarely see the sun a long time during the day - i compensate with very strong amounts of daily Vitamin D3 + K2 and Omega 3. We are talking about at least 10.000 IU Vitamin D3 here !

It works very for me indeed !

I can not complain about my looks in sheer numbers being almost 58. I recognize the Ralf-typical looks, even if the reflections have changed a little, i am very happy to see the typical Ralf in my face. It feels... what shall I say... "home-y". And I do very little do keep the looks. It is mainly about cutting hair(No i am not coloring it), empathizing eye brows which run a bit thin at higher age, and coloring my beard from time to time. That's all. Nothing more.


"The reflection has changed a little bit"

Sureeeeee - I have a lot more wrinkles around my eyes, and they are a bit more "compressed" with the skin hanging down above (eye lids) - but that belongs to natural age.

Frankly, I don't care so much - even if i do observe the changes closely. (I joke a lot about it in the end) As a photographer, i do observe changes in my looks as well in others, of coure. That is part of the passion. And gods knows, how much my looks vary from day to day.


Bad days. Good days. And everything in between...

Sometimes there are bad days, and you get 10 years added on top, and then there are days where 10 years are shaved off. I find that really fascinating, that looks can vary so much...

So, it seems to me that there is no fixed age, really. Rather instead, a span width of ages. Often up to +/- 10 years. I remember back then in 2011, when i blew up considerably while being together with Daniel - and while i didn't groom myself much, nor my beard/stubbles or my eye brows... i looked suddenly 15 years older.

I suffered badly from such a sudden change within less than 2 years. From boy-toy to daddy-middle age. GAAAH !!!! First, people thought i was around the age 29-30 - and then all of the sudden i looked like 45-49 ... (which felt like a chock to me). It really affected my mind badly psychologically, affecting my sexuality and everything else. Of course, also my marriage to Daniel. I tend to withdraw both from my partner as well from myself...

It was around 2013, when i started to keep my weight in check, to begin with a little bit and more later on, and grew a stronger beard, which kept my featureless puffy face in check with a marked "line". So things to revert to something that looked more like a natural Ralf again.

By 2014 in the separation with Daniel, i lost 20+ kilo weight, going down from originally 103 to 83 kilo and my looks where suddenly more like 35 of age, albeit I was already 48 years of age.

And that's when I met Sal. *grin*

From there, there i went gradually up again *LOL* Ain't life wonderful.... *snigger*


Humor - is important !

One thing is very important: HUMOR !!! Not to take things so blood seriously. After all - when you come into the age of Fifty fucking Eight... you really should take yourself to bloody seriously.


It is strange feeling to that number...

Ralf... 58 years of age. What the fuck ?! How did that happen ?! And I am only 3 years short of what my father was in the age of 61, when he died.


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